seeing+knife=scream

2/1/2010

Last night, my older sister was playing with me in the kitchen. She took out a huge knife, and I literally screamed, and I could feel the organs in my throat vibrate. It was like, in soprano mode or something. You know what the funny part was? I remember every single thing I did before that moment, but when I saw that knife, I don’t even know what I did. Did I just close my eyes and scream, or look at the knife and scream? I got no clue. haha Well anyways, my dad was in the kitchen too, and he looked at me in disbelief. My neighborhood is super quiet, and my voice could probably be heard everywhere. I can’t help it though, I just can’t stand looking at knives. It freaks me out. Whenever I see one, I just scream hysterically. It’s weird, yet funny at the same time. Even when my sister grabbed a butter knife from a cake box in front of me. I gave out a scream and scurried back. Also when I watched Jennifer’s body, when she got “sacrified”, my legs got numb. I saw the knife they were going to use, and I just couldn’t take it. I can just imagine what I would be like if a burglar came into my house and brought out a knife. I’d frickin scream, and that would be the last noise I would make. haha I can’t help it though. I’m not like, irrationally afraid of knives, it’s just a reflex of mine to scream when I see one.

That’s my story. I can’t quite tell if I actually have a knife phobia or paranoia towards knives. I don’t think it’s either, and here’s why:

Phobia: 

an exaggerated usually inexplicable and illogical fear of a particular object, class of objects, or situationan

Paranoia:

a thought process heavily influenced by anxiety or fear, often to the point of irrationality and delusion

Which do you think I have? Is it neither, the way I think of it? What’s a good word for it then? The symptom I have, the natural reflex I have towards seeing a knife? Comment your answer here.

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One Response to “seeing+knife=scream”

  1. […] wrong with me. Maybe all this has to do with my fear of knives. I describe the situation here: https://soulthecolorpurple.wordpress.com/2010/02/01/seeingknifescream/#respond I don’t know what’s wrong with me, I just get uneasy during those situations. What do […]

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